Airport Employees Are Rude Cows!

That's cows in the British way, meaning dimwitted, not fat.

Why are they all so mean? I actually had one of the ladies that works the security line at O'Hare try to put one of those "walk this way" rope thingies through me while I was asking her where I need to go. Then she directed me down a line that ended in the middle of nowhere. When I went under the rope to get back into what may have been a line, she gave me a dirty look. I thought to myself, "Keep staring and I'll shave your uni-brow!" Don't even get me started with the girls at the McDonald's counter. I still have unfinished business with one of them. And by unfinished business, I mean a swift throat punch.

I've been stuck in O'Hare for about 22 hours now, and it looks like another 12 before I can get to Balitmore. My breath wreaked, but I had some Junior Mints, so I'm golden.

I'm not flying back to the UK. I'll schedule a ride on a fishing boat with shady bearded men before I step foot on a plane again.

Back in the UK

Well, we are back from our trip to the United States. The intent was to visit family, but it ended up being more of a "watch our families gush over Lucy" type thing. That's alright, because as cute as she is, we fully expected it. It was nice, because of the 33 days we were home, I woke up early only 1 day to get Lucy up. More often than not, the grandparents would wake her up early so they had more time with her. I got to do the glamorous side of parenting, with no poop, spit, or boogers.

Roses and Thorns of this vacation:

Thorn: The day we left England, I hadn't slept a wink. I was too nervous about WMD's or some such nonsense being found in my baggage, or something like a freak storm that would delay flights. In all, at the end of the trip, I had been up nearly 45 hours straight.

Rose: Dad's first sermon he preached once we got there was entirely on babies, and Lucy was the star. Gushing grandpa's should not be allowed to preach with grand babies in the congregation. Anyways, Jess and I discussed her "stardom", and we've decided to tone it back a little, as we don't want her pulling a Lohan.

Rose: I finally bought an SLR camera! I was saving for a big ole' digital model, but decided I should start with an inexpensive film camera to see if I'm any good a photography. It's a Pentax K1000, and the first role I took of black and white turned out pretty good. I'd post the pics, but reread this paragraph, and you'll see why I can't.

Thorn: In Iowa, every single person in the house (except Lucy) had the flu over a 72 hour period. I, unfortunately, had eaten a massive meal at Bennigan's before my date with the flu. Just in case you were wondering, baked potato soup is better going down. Not up. Also, we were supposed to go to Chicago that day so Jess could shop. Oh well, next year.

Rose: In Florida, everyone got sick there too (thornish), but not us!

Rose: We got to see most of our close friends. For me, that would be Tim, Jenn, and Krista in Iowa. For Jess, that would be the entire state of Florida, southern Alabama, and Cuba.

Thorn: On our flight to Florida from Iowa, we had a connection in Atlanta. Jess had to change Lucy, so we were last in line to board a plane we had bought tickets for. As we were about to give the guy our tickets, he left for 20 minutes. When he came back, he said the plane was too heavy and that they had to pull people off. The next flight wasn't for 20 hours, so we rented a car at 11pm and drove the 5 hours to Jess' parents.

Rose: I had 4 Triple Lindy's from Moe's. Do you think that's excessive? If so, shut up about it already.

Rose: Both of our families are doing well, and everyone is healthy. It's cool, because our families are pretty socially different. 2 weeks with my parents are different than 2 weeks with her parents. But, put those 4 weeks together, and you get our family. Pretty cool indeed.

Thorn: Had to rent another car from Florida to Iowa because of a storm that came through the southeast and screwed up Atlanta, again! That's 16 hours of driving folks, extended to 20 because we have an infant that craps and eats. Or eats and craps. Chicken or the egg.

Rose: Job prospects at home look good. That's comforting, because I wouldn't mind getting out of the UK a little earlier than expected.

Thorn: We had to eventually leave the States.

Rose: Our bed in England is very, very comfy.